Do the two go together? I preached on Faith this morning - Jesus talks about having the faith of a mustard seed - and didn't talk about doubt. Of course there is only so much time to preach, and I feel I'm pushing the edges already.
However, what's the role of Doubt in faith? For me, it's critical to be able to doubt, to be able to grapple with concepets of God, to struggle with ideas and thoughts on what we believe. I recall times in church where, as a pastor in front of the congregation on a Sunday morning, I'd end up leading a prayer from the "book" that would go something like "help us extinquish our doubt, so we can believe well" or "remove from us our doubts in order to believe completely". As I'd be reading these prayers, my mind would be doing flips. Remove Doubt? Are you kidding?
Certainty seems to have it's benefits - like when you trust the US Postal Service enough to "know" if you give them the envelope with your rent check, they'll get it promptly to your landlord - but in matters of religon... why does certainty seem to scare me?
There are many, MANY, who seem to really seek certainty in and from their religious leaders. We want to know that what we believe is right or true. Perhaps we want to make sure we're in the right religion. Or perhaps we want assurrance that the religion we're in - or the religious beliefs we have - are the right ones.
How can questioning, doubting, provide any form of assurance? Look at the story of Jacob wrestling with the angel of God (Genesis 32:23-31)... he did it alone and in the dark. He was preparing himself to meet his brother Essau whom he'd cheated out of his birthright many years prior. he ends up wrestling with someone??? an angel???? the whole night. And just as the sun is about to come up, and Jacob is about to win, the angel? dislocates his hip or something similar to that, and it permanently damages him. Yet he prevails, and ends up receiving a blessing from the Divine one. At the end of the struggle, the angel changes his name to Israel. In the bible, a name change reflects a change in the person, either their mission has changed (as in Paul) or they have changed the direction of their lives (as in Paul and Abraham) or something equally as deep.
This story has both attracted me and held a lot of meaning for me over the years. I see this story as a metaphor for the spiritual journey. He struggles with his God and ends up not only blessed by it, but ends up seeing the face of God - "I have seen God face to face, yet my life has been spared" v.31.
Is there something, holy even, about honest gut-level down-to-earth truly seeking of the Divine?
Another name I have for this mysterious "God-thing" is the Sacred Mystery. It's sacred for obvious reasons. It's a mystery because we humans, in present form, cannot fathom the depths the Holy One, but boy do we try. Doctrines and theology are our attempts to plumb the depths so to speak. Yet... the thing is... the deeper we go, the bigger we realize this thing really is... and we're never going to "hit the bottom" of it.
So we have theology and doctrine that tries to explain and make sense of what we know. Not bad! The problem is when we say we've already explained the "faith", and your not to quesition it.
I say problem, but perhaps I need to remember that there are differetn kinds of people, some that do not wish to question faith issues -have no need for it, and then there are those of us that are very comfortable jumping into the deep end of the pool.
I'm very intersted in continuing this conversation. However I'm here at home, with a couple of kids that are making noise and playing, so I;m having a little trouble concentrating. I'm afraid to review what I've read, perhaps it might sound a bit too rambly.
Someone comment - ask a question or something - and we'll take it from there.
Of course there are lot's of other discussions to jump into on this Blog too.
My 2 cents
Pastor Chad
4 comments:
First of all, thank you for choosing that passage. I remember reading it a few months ago and I was a little disturbed by it. I realized that it was a struggle, but I didn't follow the thought through enough to realize it was a metaphor for all of us struggling to find our faith in God. We have to face the darkness (in ourselves?) and be tried over and over again.
I think I understand what you're saying about the doubt. It's good because it keeps one from becoming laxidasical (how DO you spell that word)about faith, God, etc. If we don't doubt, then it all starts to become ordinary, everyday, or even worse, it becomes something we believe just for the sense of believing?
So doubting keeps us searching and changing our beliefs, but it also keeps our mind focused on God and what He means to us?
I suppose if we didn't question, there might be a danger of taking the "God stuff" for granted.
But maybe Doubt can be a gift in the sense that it invites us into the Sacred Mystery... knowing we won't fully "understand" until the next life (if even then).
I once talked about the Apophatic and the Kataphatic styles of spirituality;
The Kataphatic style shows itself in worship through, for example,
-organized liturgy
-prayers from a book
-Prayers are offered to a God that is more often than not seen as being "out there" somewhere.
-There is a chasm, a divide, between the human and the divine.
The Apophatic style of worship, in contrast
-is very comfortable with silences
-it tends to observe that the divine also resides "within"
-makes more allowances for "the Spirit" to guide a worship service
-allow for prayers to be more free form.
I'm sure you can see which one tends to be most reflective of a typical worship service. And as a result, you can imagine why most people that go to church tend to identify themselves more with the Kataphatic style.
And which one do you think the "Doubters" fall under?
So where are the Apophatic folks? They are usually not in our churches... if they go, they might be more attracted to traditions that are more reflective of their inners proclivities.
Where are the doubters? They are there... they are just typically more silent for fear of being discovered, unless they know it's okay to speak up.
However the $64,000 question (remember that show?) is... and here's the crux of the "faith and doubt" issues... how does the divine present itself to you? How are you invited into the Sacred Mystery? Is it through re-examining your faith? Is it by accepting what has been "handed" to you through the church?
We ought to respect the two forms, and all the variants in between, because they both lead to the same God. Just different ways of getting there. One persons path is not very useful to another. But it's hopefully useful to the one travelling on it.
And I'm a firm believer... if the path you're on doesn't work for you... find a new one! Trust the Spirit... that it WILL lead you to God!
Pr. C-
Pr. Chad's mention of the two approaches to worship reminds me a little of the history of our congregation. When we first came to ASLC in 1978, the congregation would use many resources: Songs of Praise books (volumes I and II, even!), all three settings from the green book, the Chicago folk service, Taize resources..... so in general, I think we as a congregation are comfortable with many different kinds of musical expression of our faith. I was interested to talk with someone a few weeks ago who missed the familiar sung liturgy when we switched to the new red book. I can see value in both ways of framing worship... one more rote, where the responses and the singing are so familiar as to provide a backdrop for thought and introspection, and one more emergent, which commands attention in a different way.
That certainly makes a lot of sense. I've noticed since coming to this church that I have to get used to a LOT of new music and phrases. I am so busy learning these that I am not able to concentrate on introspection at the time. I am too busy making sure that I'm saying/singing the correct thing and not doing a solo from my previous church. One of these days, I'm either going to get it or start singing a different Alleluiah.
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