Food For The Journey

Yesterday we had a good Sacred Space, our last one for a few months. Our theme, as you’ve heard, was “Letting Go”. We all seem to have stuff to let go of, from old baggage that’s not helpful to us anymore, old hurts or memories. Sometimes we are forced to let go of something due to circumstance beyond our control; such as age, physical limitations (that seem to grow over the years), etc.

Last night, in keeping with our tradition, we had a reading (or two) to introduce our evening. I want to share one of our two poems with you- one that certainly does speak to us of letting go. What does this say to you? Listen to the ideas within the words.

Gentle me,

Holy One,

into an unclenched moment,

a deep breath,

a letting go

of heavy experiences,

of shriveling anxieties,

of dead certainties,

that, softened by the silence,

surrounded by the light,

and open to the mystery,

I may be found by wholeness,

upheld by the unfathomable,

entranced by the simple,

and filled with the joy

that is you.

– Ted Loder

“Gentle me, Holy one, into an unclenched moment…”

“Gentle me”… a passive voice, an action being done to us. Perhaps assuming we do not often Gentle ourselves.

And how many moments in our lives are clenched? Clenched with expectations, clenched by whatever baggage we carry into our days, or our relationships? Hold on – to your assumptions, to what you think is true! Hold on! Don’t let go! What would happen if you did, though? Seems to take some gentleness for sure to be able to do that.

“…a letting go of heavy experiences…”

Heavy experiences indeed. As a pastor for over a decade now, I am struck by how heavy some people’s burdens are, by what people with them day to day, burdens brought on often by heavy experiences. What weight we carry.

“…of shriveling anxieties… of dead certainties…”

Someone commented last night about this portion of the poem, on how anxieties can shrivel us, as they suck our energy, our thoughts, our lives out of us. Shriveling anxieties… those seeds of doubt, of worry, of uncertainties that can grow into suffocating weeds of paralysis and distress.

And what are “dead certainties”? Perhaps those things that are realities in our lives that mean nothing. How often I have heard of people in well-paying jobs who feel the job is slowly strangling them.

I don’t advocate divorce easily! But there are some times where divorce may be the better choice! Would feeling the weight of needing to stay in a destructive relationship qualify as a dead certainty? Dead certainty… How many of those do we have in our lives?

“…that, softened by the silence,

surrounded by the light,

and open to the mystery,

I may be found by wholeness…”

“I may be found by wholeness…” a passive waiting, an unclenched moment of openness that only allows for the mystery to find us. So counter intuitive! Many years ago, when I was in High School overseas (my father was in the Government), I lived Kenya, and as part of one of our school trips we had a chance to go to the coast, to the Indian Ocean. Well, as part of this week out there, I went snorkeling for the first time. I’d been told to go down with some bread and as the bread would dissolve, they told me, the fish would come!

Well, I took bread underwater with me, put a piece between my hands and began rubbing them back and forth. And within a few seconds, I was surrounded by dozens of brightly colored fish of various sizes. It was like a National Geographic moment for sure. I was almost immediately tempted to reach out to touch these fish… but I couldn’t. They were way too fast! Again, I tried. And again. No fish! But I could feel their fins, the pressure their tails made when they quickly turned back and forth. So I just held out my hands, palms open, fingers cupped, and let them fill the empty space my hands made. Did I “hold” the fish? No… but were they in my grasp? Yep. I had to let go of the idea of “grabbing” the fish and let them come to me – a passive shift in perspective.

“…I may be found…” Not “I will seek”, or “I will find”. But that it may find me… once I have been gentled enough into an unclenched moment, opened enough to be found by… “wholeness, upheld by the unfathomable, entranced by the simple, and filled with the joy that is you.

May the empty spaces of your lettings-go be found by Grace and Peace.

Pr. C-