Epiphany... questions on "call"

This Epiphany season we've been talking about "call" and what that might mean. On the first Sunday I talked about this topic, the reading was of young Samuel as helper to Eli the prophet, and as he’s sleeping he hears a voice call him – “Samuel!” The first two times he gets up and goes to his mentor, Eli, to find out why Eli had called him from his sleep. But Eli catches on, and tells him the next time he hears “the voice” say his name, he’s to respond with “Here, I am Lord”. He does hear the voice- and he responds as he is told… and the Lord does in fact speak to him.

And the Gospel reading that day was of Jesus calling a few of the disciples. He walked up to them as they are minding their own business, and “calls” them – you know, “Come, follow me” – and they do. It’s that easy.

Wow- would that it were that easy for us to hear God’s messages in the world like that! Samuel heard a voice- a clear and audible voice. And the disciples had Jesus walk up and invite them to follow him, and they do so with absolute certainly and clarity!

These are held up as examples of what a “Call” from God might look like. We have some assumptions of what a “call” like this might be; possibly dramatic but for sure clear, usually a call is for a life-time, and it almost always has to do with ministry in some way. Right? “I got a call to be a missionary, and I’ve been working with the villagers in the Amazon rain forest for 25 years spreading the Gospel” or something like that.

Actually when I was back on Internship in 1997, after a church service one Sunday, a young man who I’d never seen before and would never see again, came to me and told me he’d been working through what he perceived as a call from God to be a missionary, and based on what I’d said that morning in my sermon, he was going to act on this call to go overseas. Sometimes it actually does work out that way.

Someone recently asked me about my “call” and I think they were expecting some answer like that – perhaps expecting me to say that since I was a child I’d felt God’s voice move me to get to Seminary and be a pastor or something. Some stories are like that, but I don’t think most are… mine certainly isn’t as cut and dry like that. I have to say, I would LOVE more clarity and certainty like this. This ministry/pastoral thing is often called a “call”, and although it is not necessarily a career one would choose just to have something to do during the day… I still struggle with whether this is a “call” or not for me!

I remember in the Steve Martin movie “LA Story”, his character asks the universe for a sign. He needs some guidance about something, and as he’s driving one day, asking for a sign - this freeway “sign” sends him a “sign”! Something like – “Here’s your sign!” and this freeway sign ends up communicating with him through the whole movie… he gets signs as he needs them. Clarity and certainty! Would that it were so simple! Just ask the question, then get in your car and drive and wait for the freeway sign to let you know what you need to do.

And yet some people, at some point, have had perhaps more clarity or more certainty than usual. I’ve had a time like that. I’ve shared the story of my daughter –She’s adopted from Ghana. On a vacation trip to the West African country back in 2000, we went to a village – visiting an orphanage and a school – we saw, among many children there, a young girl. Something struck me about her right off the bat. I didn’t know what to make of it at first, but later, after putting all the different pieces together, I began to notice there was something more to this whole adventure than just mere chance. I felt a strong sense of guidance for sure. I knew I had to act… to the best of my ability. I knew I had to do my part. I didn’t know how it would end though. I didn’t know we would eventually return toGhana and come back 11 years ago today with a new daughter!

And let’s say you do get clarity and certainty about what you think God wants you to do (in the church let’s say)… The church however has some thoughts about “Call”; it’s not a private/personal thing! And… as a result, the church must validate whether or not you think you have a call to serve in the church or not. Meaning, the “church”, through its representatives, must be involved in the discernment of this “call” to ministry in and among the church’s people.

“Ministry in the church”… wow, does seem to have an air of importance and specialness, doesn’t it? Almost as if this were the pinnacle of “call” in the world. It’s not! I think this is one of the assumptions about “call” we often carry around with us. If it’s not for the “church” then somehow it’s not a “real call”. Banish this thought! I have known some pretty exceptional people who managed to influence lives for the better, who were able to bring light to their corner of the world, who really helped people in some very tangible ways… that had nothing, nothing, to do with church.

“And whatever your call is, it must be FOREVER!” And another one of these misplaced ideas is that a “call” must last a life-time… and if it doesn’t, then we are somehow wrong or a failure or something like that. What about the idea of a “call” for a “season” in life… not forever, but only for a time. I remember when I was a teenager, we’d come back for home-leave from some years abroad, and I hung around the daughter of some friends of my grandparents. She was about my age and had her license, so she and her cousin, and my sister and I bummed around together. I remember talking to my mother about this young lady- that I didn’t like her in that way and because of that was questioning whether I should hang around her so much. She said, “You’re not going to marry her, just be her friend!” Meaning- being her friend and hanging around while we were here on home-leave didn’t imply some long-term commitment in that way. Just enjoy this connection for a season… let it be what it is, as it is.

But be present with it! Could I have spent time with my friend, without worrying whether there was more to this than just what it was, for that season in my life... and gotten the most from it? By the way, we ended up becoming good friends over the years, writing to each other (back in the day before e-mail) until her death in her early 20’s.

Being present with the “call”… not fighting it, not spending too much time “figuring it out”, or needing more to go on before jumping into what it might entail, or adding more assumptions that may or may not be there, not making it more than what it is… just being present with it, as it is!

Another idea of “call” is that God needs us. Does God “need” us? God called Jonah to go to Nineveh and preach to them- “Repent for your evil ways, or God will destroy you!” He reluctantly does… and they turn from their evil ways, and God spares them. Did God needJonah? Meaning, if Jonah hadn’t done what God had asked him… would the mission not have been fulfilled?

If I don’t do what God wants me to do… if I don’t do it… am I bad? I don’t want to go to India! Sorry God, but I don’t want to go! Is this a sin? “It is a sin – Go! You’ll learn to like being a missionary!” Sounds a lot like an arranged marriage! “But pastor, if God called you to do this… and you don’trespond… this is by definition sin- rebellion against God!” This sort of assumes you’ve heard the “call” with perfect clarity, and perfect certainty. There may even be a little hubris there.

But first, a question: If the creator of the universe can make order out of chaos, can create things from nothing (ex nihilo)… if God is omnipotent… then why would God have needed Jonah? I don’t think God needed Jonah. In fact I don’t think God needs us! It’s a little conceited to think the creator of the universe needs us, or something wouldn’t get done… don’t you think. Thinking God needs us may actually express more our exaggerated sense of self-worth rather than the reality of God’s lack of power.

But I do believe God wants us… God is inviting us… to be a part of making the world a better place. Can God do it all without us? If you believe God is omnipotent… then the only answer would have to be “Of Course”! But believing God invites us into ministry, invites us into bringing more light into the world, then that’s a whole other question. And that’s where I stand on this; we’re asked, invited, cajoled perhaps at times, even prompted… but maybe never against our will.

In the movie “Blind Side”, based on a true story, the Sandra Bullock character sees this young man walking home from school with no jacket in winter. She stops to talk to him, and after finding out he has no home, she invites him to her home. Being a person of faith, she felt God’s prompting to do this. She acted, not out of a sense of coercion, but out of a sense of faith. She could have said “no”. Would that have been a sin?

There’s a classmate of mine from Seminary who lives and works in North Carolina. He wears his clerical collar a lot… not as a way of telling the world he’s a pastor- although that certainly happens. But he wears it more so to invite people to enter into a conversation about faith, or God or whatever. It’s not in-your-face… but an invitation.

Boy do we want perfect certainty! Man, would we love perfect clarity! I don’t think it works that way all the time though. At least not for me. We don’t have perfect clarity, or perfect certainty! That, in our world, is an illusion! By the fact that we are fallible and imperfect, by the fact that we see life through certain proverbial lenses (of politics, up-bringing, circumstance, beliefs, values, etc) our view of reality is always biased in one form or another. That cannot be helped.

Here’s an example: answer this question as you see fit – What kind of music should be played in church?

– Seriously… take a few seconds to answer here before moving on –

Any kind of music? Only certain kinds? No kind of music?

Now ask yourself why you came up with this answer. How do you know you’re right? Thing is… you’re not right… for everyone. You’re only right for yourself. But the fact that you tried to answer this question implied you were answering it not only for yourself, but for others… and your answer may not be right for everyone else.

My very first Seminary class was “The Churches Worship”. I’d missed one session once, so I asked a classmate for some notes. The class I’d missed had to do with the Eucharist. They had compared the different understandings of Eucharist among the different traditions out there… and the instructor brought up about the Roman Catholic understanding. Well, this understanding is based on Aristotle’s ideas of what something looks like (“accident”) versus what it really is (“substance”). So in the Roman Catholic understanding, the elements of bread and wine, after consecration, only look like bread and wine (appearance – or “accident”) but they are really the body and blood of Christ (change of “substance”, or essence). Then my classmate reflected a question that my instructor had offered the class… “Who’s to say he (Aristotle) was right?” Had I been there, I would have responded, “Well, Mark, by that logic… who’s to say anyone’s right?”

We have a bias in how we look at things – just by the fact that we are alive, and we hold certain values and beliefs. With those things we hold dear, adding our histories and backgrounds, and you get a “lens” we happen to see life through – all the events and activities and choices in it. This “lens” colors how we see… and that brings a bias.

Go back to the church music question – I was talking with someone about a year ago about this very thing – church music. They said some music was appropriate and some wasn’t. I asked how they could tell the difference. And basically it came down to preference; based on background, training, history, etc… but still preference. And you can’t argue based on preference! It’s a bias! We do not have absolute certainty or absolute clarity.

Now- there are certain things that we can all, or mostly all agree to – like the idea that murder is wrong. But these questions are different. These questions are about making rules so we can all live together in harmony. But still based on some level of bias, based on a lens through which we see life – that killing people in certain circumstances is wrong, on a primal level believing we would not want to be killed ourselves.

“There are no absolutes? But pastor, in the bible it says ‘Thou shall not kill.’” Actually that quote is more accurately translated – “Thou shall not murder”. And it only applied to fellow Israelites… implying everyone else was fair game. And… the bible also said God led Joshua in killing every living thing in Jericho; men, women, children, animals, plants… everything living was to be killed. Deuteronomy 21 allows a parent and the elders of the village to stone a disrespectful child to death. So does Leviticus chapter 20. Evidently this is not considered murder.

This certainly does not provide any more clarity for us! It does not give us more certainty. Who of the mentally sound among us, while sanctioned by the bible, would actually kill our own children? I have worked in prison ministry before- and have known some women who have actually killed their children. They are in prison for it, and according to our standards, rightly so.

Although we do not have perfect clarity or perfect certainty, we do the best we can… and I think that is all God can ask of us… and all we can ask of ourselves.

I will later on talk about the idea of a “call” as a way of life rather than as a thing you do.

Until next time…

Pr. C-